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    ~ Live your life by design ~

    When I first started teaching Martial Arts professionally, I would tell my master instructor that I was going to open my own school someday, 9 years before it happened. Whenever my mother would ask me what I wanted for my birthday or Christmas I would tell her a BMW. I had my first one in 2005. With the opening of the new dojo I have seen yet another HUGE goal accomplished.
    In the 1993 I started working for the person that would serve as my mentor for nearly 20 years. Personal self development and developing a plan to live my life by, personally and professionally, was one of the most important things I learned from that relationship. I have seen ....

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  • Fairness

    ~ Fairness
    ~ How many times have we heard our children say "That's not fair!" How many times have we said it ourselves. People tend to think that fairness means everyone receives the same regardless of situation. We all know based on this standard life will never be fair. Life's idea of fairness is that if you have more skill and ability then you get bigger challenges. That's usually the bosses idea of fairness as well. If we looked at higher expectations as being a compliment instead of being upset over someone else not having the same expectations, we would probably all be happier. It's a hard lesson to teach a child. Helping them understand that fairness takes into ....

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  • Growth

    is the fifth human need and is considered a spiritual need. Not from a religious aspect, but from a fulfillment aspect. Tony Robbins has a simple saying “Progress equals Happiness”. When we are growing or making progress we have a sense of fulfillment. When we are stagnant and feel like we are not moving forward we have feelings of frustration and we may feel like our life has no meaning. Growth is also a law of nature. In nature all living things are either growing or dying. Jim Rohn asks the question “How tall will a tree grow?” The answer is as tall as it can. It will shoot it’s roots down as deep as it can, it will stretch it’s ....

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  • Certainty

    Mentally / emotionally there are 6 basic human needs we all need to meet. Certainty, uncertainty, significance, love or connection, growth and contribution. The first four are our primal needs, the last two our spiritual needs. People find ways to meet these needs in positive, negative or neutral ways, but everyone finds ways to meet them. Over the next several weeks we will explore each one.

    is having the feeling of stability in our life. We all need to feel certain about our ability to have food, clothing and shelter. Sometimes it’s our faith or positive outlook on life.

    Think about the positive actions or memories that give the feeling of ....

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  • Self Control

    Stephen Covey, author of the best seller and a great book “The seven habits of highly successful people”, says that a huge difference between humans and animals is that in between a stimulus and the response we have the freedom to choose. I believe self-control is when we exercise that freedom.
    Many people think of self-control as physical and mental. Although when we really look at it, all self-control is mental. It’s our thoughts and decisions that drive our actions. Part of this is impulse control. I remember as a child I would have a thought and act on it without thinking about consequences. I work with many children who have the same challenge. ....

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  • Confidence

    As a martial artist that performed at many tournaments and demos I can tell you that confidence in your performance directly affects your outcome. This is especially true when you're performing on your own. You can mess up terribly and if you do it with confidence many people won't even know. I was at a tournament one time as a blue belt in front of 5 judges and there was a tie for 1st and 2nd place. I was always told that if you are breaking a tie it's better to do a different form than the one you just performed. I decided to do the green belt kata. I had learned it early from watching other people and practicing it. However I found myself facing the wrong way halfway through the ....

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  • Positive vs. Negative

    We’ve reviewed the 6 human needs; certainty, variety, significance, love & connection, growth and contribution. It’s important to understand that consciously or unconsciously we will strive to meet these needs. One of our goals should be to make sure we are proactively working towards meeting these needs in a positive way. One of the most empowering exercises I did at the Tony Robbins seminar was to write out all the positive ways and negative ways I was meeting these needs. It helped me identify some bad habits and some habits I can replace them with. I also realized where I had gaps in my needs and made decisions to fill them in. Our habits are like a garden. Like ....

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  • Benefits of Martial Arts

    This morning while talking with one of the Krav-Fit students I was reminded of how martial arts has had such a profound Impact on my life. In 1990-91 I was living a very sedentary lifestyle. I was working a lot of hours, not taking care of myself physically and my eating habits were very bad. I had started my martial arts training in 1989, but due to a move to Utica, I had stopped and hadn’t returned to the dojo since coming back to Syracuse. One morning I stepped on the scale, which I had every several weeks as I watched my weight continuing to increase, and it read 205 lbs., 35 lbs. heavier than when I started my martial arts training. I decided it was time to do something. I ....

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  • Love and Connection

    Love and connection are two very powerful human needs. People will do many things to avoid loss of love. When babies are born one of the things they need most is the feeling of love from their mother. Love and touch actually cause your child's brain to grow, according to Marian Diamond, a neuroscientist at the University of California. Peer pressures are an extremely powerful force at any age. Think of all the things that are done so we can stay in favor with our peers. If we are around the right peer group, this can be very empowering and help us to succeed at high levels in work, school or in social circles. However, if we are trying to stay connected to the wrong group, ....

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  • Significance

    is the third human need. We all have a need to feel important, that in some way we matter. If we don’t meet this need we may feel empty inside. To me, knowing I am making a positive difference in peoples lives, feeds my need for significance. Everyone has different ways to meet that need. It may be what is in your bank account, the house you live in, kind of car you drive. You may receive it through career/academic activities and accomplishments. I receive significance from those things as well. However, I have found that material possessions, although nice, have lost their ability to fuel my need for significance over the years. Knowing what makes ....

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