Love and connection are two very powerful human needs. People will do many things to avoid loss of love. When babies are born one of the things they need most is the feeling of love from their mother. Love and touch actually cause your child's brain to grow, according to Marian Diamond, a neuroscientist at the University of California.
Peer pressures are an extremely powerful force at any age. Think of all the things that are done so we can stay in favor with our peers. If we are around the right peer group, this can be very empowering and help us to succeed at high levels in work, school or in social circles. However, if we are trying to stay connected to the wrong group, it can be very damaging to our wellbeing and the lives of the people around us. Like it or not, we will become like the people we associate with. So choose your peer group wisely.
Take a look outside of yourself as well. What are you doing to help those around you feel the appropriate level of connection? People will try and help someone else feel love or connection in ways that they themselves feel love and connection. Try and understand what the other person needs to feel connected. You may need to feel contact from a handshake or hug. They may need to hear their name or see your eyes. If you try and hug someone who isn’t a hugger you’ll do the opposite of making the connection, they’ll actually start to put up a wall.
This is the perfect time of year to rebuild and strengthen connections with friends and family. Who could you call or write, just to hello and let them know you’re thinking about them? It only takes a moment and can be a gesture that is truly appreciated.